I've learned so much Kaden, since you've left my side. The days move a little faster, time keeps going by. I've learned to force a smile and also to hide the pain. I've learned things aren't over, and that I'll see you again. Sitting in my car, my eyes swell up with tears. If only heaven was so much closer, I'd come and hold you near. And sitting in my home, I envision you upstairs, I would walk into your nursery, if only you were there. I try to speak about you, but people find it hard to talk. Why is it tough for them when I'm the one who's lost. And Daddy thinks about you, but wishes it away. I hang up all your pictures, on a gloomy summer day. I know that time tells so many things, but why does it tell it so harsh when it's written so simply. Time can make a person, or it can tear them apart. For me, my son, I sit and wonder about if you were here. I'm sure I'd smile in my joy, instead I hide in fear. I write in hopes of you to understand, how much I wanted to be your mom. I write in hopes of clarifying that you're really gone. I wish I could turn back the page, rewrite the short sad plot. I know things are differently than I originally thought. Just remember that I love you, my fragile little boy, remember all the tears but also all the joy. You must know that you mean so much, that I would give anything to only have you close. Hug your Papaw Bayne, and tell him we miss him too, tell him the story of us holding you. Liam loves you Kaden, and we love you more. We'll think of you my baby, and always cherish your name.
